it just is

she has cancer

my mother.

at first
it didn?t seem so bad

then
over the months
with each test
each treatment

the bad grew
to outweigh
the good.

it is hard
to imagine
life without
the woman who
gave you life

i have only known
the world
with mom
in it

i simply cannot
imagine it
without her.

watching
the cancer progress
helps

she is
being eaten away
from the inside

it is preparing me
for the day
she will not be here
at all.

most days
you can forget
and live as if
life were normal

though i am sure
she can?t

then something will
hit you
like a punch
in the stomach

like the ones
my brother
perfected

the unseen hurts

i look at
my mother
pleadingly

silently wishing
her
to make it right

but of course
she can?t

she is dying

and that is all there is to it.

nothing
can be done.

we bring her
treats

wine and scallops
are sorry consolation
for losing your life

but at this stage
creature comforts
are all she has

other than that
we try not
to cry

when we see her walk
as if her feet
were glass

we try not
to remember
the woman she was

spry
smart
present

before the cancer came

because
it hurts
too much

we will remember

after.

for now
it seems so little
a favour to do

to not react

when she
throws up

or messes
her pants

or tells
a story
for the
sixth time

she knows
ya know

she can tell

just like
she always knew

mom always knows

if she
gets a hint
she has told
the story
before
she will simply
stop talking

she has
her pride

then we will lose
what little
we have left
of her

and so
we bring
her treats

and listen
to her stories

as we
watch her

slowly
die

thankful
we get to say
i love you

one
more
time

legacy voices*

yours is the first voice
the first story
i ever heard
yours is a story
with absolutely no
degree of separation
from the flesh
devouring flesh
experience of
orchestrated genocide

the father with
bruises that hurt
and bleed
the son inheriting
a legacy
of fresh
infected wounds

in every place
in every time
there are those
among us
that know the
impacts left
by a legacy

i heard yours
first person
for the first time
under your sky
once the home to
stars and dreams
all but smashed
to pieces by the
demon
belief
breath
smock
cloak

i learned for
the first time
how thunder can
run and hide
emerging later
to unleash
confusion
on the already
lost
and confused

will your story
emerge with
the other stories
and bring with it the
measures required by our
ancestors
or will
it rise like a tide
appearing in
settler psyche
again
and again
for generation
upon generation
upon generation

ours is the duty
and yours are the
hammer fists
that will bring truth home
denial is no longer a barrier
to sleep
yours are the legacy
voices,
to be listened to
to be cared for
to be healed
to be respected

* This poem is dedicated to the Indigenous people who survived, and those that did not survive, the Canadian residential school system. A system that was supported financially by the federal government and run by the church.

Second Sip of the Communion Cup

What am I looking at?

Who is this looking
Back at me?

Those eyes.

Whose eyes are they?

I remember, a long time ago,
When things were different.
Those eyes had so much.

How I wish I could
Drown myself in the
Eyes of my youth.

Gone! All Gone!
Stripped away by the years,
The world, by myself.

Those eyes have been emptied,
And then replenished.

With what?

I have filled my eyes
With a lifetime of sin.
How do I drain this
Evil from my eyes.

I want these doors to be
Opened back up to the world.

How do I cleanse my body, my eyes,
From my sin.

Do I pray?

Do I take a second sip of the
Communion Cup?

This Island Marks Us, Tho

This island marks us, tho,
with a melancholy sting
Some stood face-first to the spray,
leaned over the rail of a ferry
crossing from Borden to Cape Tormentine, spirits
lightening as the water and growing distance
washed a layer of melancholia away
Others, bound to this island, rusted / like so many back-field
car husks. / Or darkened, disappearing into their own anorexic
shadows
Some reddened, pores bleeding sweat, exasperation, damnation
into money-hungry soil that bloomed bankruptcies
This island marks us,
Apprentices all. Masters, none

News Release: Ministry of Communities, Cultural Affairs and Labour

July 23, 2008

CHARLOTTETOWN, PEI — The jury for the 2008 PEI Book Award has released the shortlist of titles for the prestigious award.

This year, for the first time, awards will be given in three categories: fiction, non-fiction and poetry. The jury received many volumes of high quality poetry submissions and determined that a special category for poetry would be a suitable addition to the Book Award program. The addition of the poetry category for this year was approved by the Department of Communities, Cultural Affairs and Labour.

?We were very impressed with the range and quality of books submitted,? said Carolyn Bertram, Minister of Communities, Cultural Affairs and Labour. ?The jury had many good titles to choose from. I am very happy to see that Prince Edward Island?s literary culture is thriving.?

The 2008 Book Award will honour the best volumes published in 2006 and 2007.

In addition to a cash prize the winner of each category will receive a commemorative work of art by Sergio and Marcela Golod of Royal Glass Design.

Winners in each of the three categories will be announced at the Prince Edward Island Book Awards to be held on September 10, 2008, Confederation Centre Public Library, 7 p.m. Copies of all of the finalist volumes can be found in Island bookstores.

BACKGROUNDER – Finalists:

Fiction:

• Shape of Things to Come by Richard Lemm – Acorn Press
• And My Name Is: Stories from the Quilt by Margie Carmichael – Acorn Press
• Bounce and Beans and Burn by Shannon Murray – Acorn Press

Non-fiction:

• La Mi-Carême en Acadie by Georges Arsenault – La Grande Marée
• Chasing the Shore by David Weale – Tangle Lane Publishing
• Sex After Baby: Why There is None by Kathleen Hamilton – Acorn Press

Poetry:

• The Enchanted House by Beth Janzen – Acorn Press
• The Taste of Water by Frank Ledwell – Acorn Press
• Beautiful Veins by Joseph Sherman – Acorn Press.

Hi All, I made this fanmix, music tracks and art for Anne and Gil's relationship shared originally in the fanmix  group but wanted to share it here with you all.  Hope you like it, art and lyrics under the cut...link to download ZIP file with tracks and art is at the end of the post.

Title:

1. I Think I Love You By Guggenheim Grotto

I think I love you but to say so would bore you ?cos we?ve only just met and I?d look dumb...
And for the most part I agree, only fools wear heart on sleeve.
Oh but girl, the way you make me feel, I wanna say it hell I wanna scream

2. I am Aglow by Sarah Harmer

I am aglow with thoughts of you
Are the stories that you told me true?
It doesn?t matter if they are
They are to me
I am aglow

Some might say these thoughts are wrong
That you might see yourself in this song
I hope that you don?t mind if you do
I am aglow with thoughts of you

Does it matter that what I remember is not true
Does it matter that all I can think of is you
Does it matter that what I remember might be
Just my own imagination painting scenes more pretty
Is it obvious? Does it show?
With thoughts of you I am aglow.

3. Butterfly by Lifehouse

She dreams of parkways and those wings
That look like parachutes
She dreams of waterfalls
That sweep your feet from under you
She finds her comfort inside
Bedtime stories and fairytales
Anything with a happy ending
She says it can never fade.

I know it won't be long
Until you turn to a butterfly
I know you're weak but you're hanging on
Cause you're dreaming of a open sky

4. Near You by Jewel

Please don't kiss me so sweet
it makes me crave a thousand kisses to follow
And please don't touch me like that
makes every other embrace seem pale and shallow
Please don't come so close
it just makes me want to make you near me always
Please don't bring me flowers
they only whisper the sweet things you'd say
Don't try to understand me
your hands already know too much anyway
It makes me want to make you near me always

5. Blind by Lifehouse

I was young but I wasn't naive
I watched helpless as you turned around to leave
And still I have the pain I have to carry
A past so deep that even you could not bury if you tried

After all this time
I never thought we'd be here
Never thought we'd be here
When my love for you was blind
But I couldn't make you see it
Couldn't make you see it
That I loved you more than you'll ever know
A part of me died when I let you go

I would fall asleep
Only in hopes of dreaming
That everything would be like is was before
But nights like this it seems are slowly fleeting
They disappear as reality is crashing to the floor

6. You Get Me Michelle Branch

So what if I see the sunshine
In the pouring rain
Some people think I'm crazy
But you say it's okay
You've seen my secret garden
Where all of my flowers grow
In my imagination
Anything goes

I, I am all you want
They, they just read me wrong

You get me
When nobody understands
You come and hold my hand, baby
You get me
You look inside my wild mind
Never knowing what you'll find
Still you want me all the time
Yeah, you do
'Cause you get me

7. To Her, With Love by Kara?s Flowers (Maroon 5)

See my dear I'm thinking of you
My how she has grown
her building blocks have all gone home
And being there is always where
I'll be
You'll see

Take your doll house dreams and make them real
I've seen the sun
I'll guide your
inspirations along
And don't let them stop you from being someone's friend
Don't bend

If you need a shoulder mine is here
And I love you
And no one can tell you what to do
And roses and diamonds could never take
the place
of your face

8. Told You So By Guggenheim Grotto

When you go walking away with the wind and the waves and
flirting with your feet,
you take a part of me and that?s what lovers feel

And when you come upon a time and place sublime and it
shows you something real
you wish me there to see and that's what lovers feel

At a party I've thrown the morning has grown and
someone's going your way
you tell them you'd rather stay and that's what lovers say

So to the garden we go, quiet and slow and we
watch the world awake
you know I love you for loves sake, isn't that what lovers say?

told you so, I'm in love with you....
told you so and I bet you love me too...

9. Wedding Song by Sarah Harmer
Well our love is an infinite thing
Like the sun's last ray on the sea
As it sets low in the west
And the moon rises

Love, I see you there
Adrift on the air
Floating by the open window

Ah, the sentiment of love
Reflections I speak of
What can enter when our hearts are open

10. Colors by Amos Lee

Yesterday I got lost in the circus,
feeling like such a mess.
And now I'm down,
I'm just hanging on the corner.
I can't help but reminisce.

Cuz when you're gone,
all the colors fade.
When you're gone,
no new years day parade.
You're gone,
colors seem to fade.

11. When You Kiss Me by Shania Twain

This could be it, I think I'm in love
It's love this time
It just seems to fit, I think I'm in love
This love is mine

I can see you with me when I'm older
All my lonely night are finally over
You took the weight of the world off my
shoulders (the world just goes away)

[Chorus:]
Oh, when you kiss me

I know you miss me--
and when you're with me
The world just goes away
The way you hold me
The way you show me that you
adore me--oh, when you kiss me

12. Then You Look at Me by Celine Dion

Laugh and cry
Live and die
Life is a dream we're dreaming

Day by day
I find my way
Look for the song and the meaning

Then you look at me
And I always see
What I have been searching for
I'm lost as can be
Then you look at me
And I am not lost anymore

14. When you Say Nothing At All Alison Krauss

Its amazing how you can speak right to my heart
Without saying a word,you can light up the dark
Try as I may I could never explain
What I hear when you dont say a thing

chorus:
the smile on your face lets me know that you need me
Theres a truth in your eyes saying you'll never leave me
The touch of your hand says you'll catch me If ever I fall
You say it best, When you say nothing at all

15. Happily Ever After In Your Eyes by Ben Harper

The morning sunrise spread her wings
While the moon hung in the sky
Held the sea in your hands
And happy ever after in your eyes

Couldn't leave you to go to heaven
I carry you in my smile
For the first time my true reflection I see
Happy ever after in your eyes

All that I can give you
Is forever yours to keep
Wake up every day with a dream
And happy ever after in your eyes

 

16. I?ll Always Be Right There by Bryan Adams

I swear to you - I will always be there for you -
there's nothin' I won't do
I promise you - all my life I will live for you - we
will make it through

Forever - we will be
Together - you and me

Oh n' when I hold ya - nothin' can compare
With all of my heart - ya know I'll always be - right
there

I believe in us - nothin' else could ever mean so much
You're the one I trust our time has come - we're not two
people

Now - we are one - ya you're second to none
Forever - we will be
Together - a family

The more I get to know ya - nothin' can compare
With all of my heart - ya know I'll always be - right
there

17. Oceans Apart by Judy Garland

Oceans apart and with only the blue between
Since we're apart
I'm yearning
I tell my heart
we must wait for another dawn
when he may be returning

How I regret the night he sailed for another shore
Will he come into sight to leave my arms no more?
I'll kiss him again
He'll know right from the very start
that we were never meant to be oceans apart

18. Easy Silence by Dixie Chicks

Children lose their youth too soon
Watching war made us immune
And I've got all the world to lose
But I just want to hold on to the

Easy silence that you make for me
It's okay when there's nothing more to say to me
And the peaceful quiet you create for me
And the way you keep the world at bay for me

19. Heaven by Bryan Adams

Oh - thinking' about all our younger years
There was only you and me
We were young and wild and free

Now nothin' can take you away from me
We've been down that road before
But that's over now
You keep me comin' back for more
Baby you're all that I want
When you're lyin' here in my arms
I'm findin' it hard to believe
We're in heaven

20. Falling Slowly by Glen Hansard and Marketa Irglova (Anne and Gilbert)

Words fall through me
And always fool me
And I can't react
And games that never amount
To more than they're meant
Will play themselves out

Take this sinking boat and point it home
We've still got time
Raise your hopeful voice you have a choice
You've made it now

Falling slowly, eyes that know me
And I can't go back
Moods that take me and erase me
And I'm painted black
You have suffered enough
And warred with yourself
It's time that you won

Bonus track: Anne of Green Gables Theme! Hope you like it and thanks for commenting.

zip file with art here: http://www.sendspace.com/file/3e4f7t

Pictured above is a 1947 Shure Model 55 I scored on Ebay for $60. It had no cartridge in it, but I fixed that with a Yamaha MZ203 cartridge I had kicking around. It took some time to get the pacement right so that the polar patern worked, but it's now my live mic of choice.

I have entrirely too much time on my hands.

Oh, and Richard Branson was there, too, but he's no movie star either. They had stars from the TV show Flashpoint. And Canada's Olympians!!! Well, it's official now: this is a total waste of my time, this show. Nothing about movies at all here, unlike past years.

Anyway it's just a sign of the times, I guess, with the changeover in ownership and personnel. Seems to me this is yet another event Ben Mulroney has taken over, along with Canadian Idol, the Oscars, and everything else. Aren't people sick and tired of him yet? I guess not, eh??